To Commander---Canadian Tank Division

[Jim Neifert <jneifert-at-shaw.ca>]

The Abbotsford BC Tank Division has aquired a much improved model of the Electronic Controller that MAG had been offering to sell to us here in Canada. Although I am sure the Americans think the, and I quote {Tyng wooden relays} will work, our agent was able to bribe one of the developers with a Big Mac and Large Fries for the plans on a much improved model using Non-wooden relays.

Jim Neifert

Abbotsford BC

 

 

MAG Announces New Products

In an unrelated story, the Maryland Attack Group announced today that it will be marketing a new line of electronic controllers, known as the "Sommer Collection", which incorporate advanced electronics with cheap wooden relays invented by Tyng Laboratories. The new products will be sold primarily outside the U.S. through a chain of retail stores known as Tri-Mart starting in Canada this summer. A Tri-Mart spokesperson stated that "Canada is essentially a third-world R/C power, so we needed a line of really cheap products for their emerging military forces. The Sommer Collection fulfills that need well." MAG forces, as well as their allies, such as the Vegas Alliance, will be using more advanced controllers that will not be available through Tri-Mart. When asked to comment about recent stories regarding the spontaneous combustion of the Tyng wooden relays, Tri-Mart stated "That shouldn't be a problem when operating in the colder northern climates".

When asked how Tri-Mart plans to market the new products up north, the Tri-Mart spokesperson said that "We'll make them an offer they can't refuse."